Easter

     Easter has never been one of my favorite times of the year.  Rabbits, eggs in bright, cheery colors, flowers, and baby animals; it's as if we're trying to give our subconscious a nauseatingly-cutesy defibrillation to wake it up from the winter dreary. In this part of the U.S. there's usually some snow still on the ground when we got all gussied up to go to church.  After we finished hunting for easter eggs and other sweets around the house (some of which weren't found until later in the year) we would go put on our Easter duds.  When I was younger my mother made frilly dresses for both my sister and me.  We would be wearing frilly dresses with bunnies, white lacy gloves, lace trimmed socks, white buckle shoes, and large white hats that sat on top of our curled and hairsprayed stiff hair.  There would be some variation on this outfit every year.  Sometimes I would have a matching hair clip instead of a hat, sometimes I would have a little white purse to go with the outfit.  Who knows, maybe when I was little I love dressing up like that. My mother also made us frilly dresses for Christmas every year.  It was a very loving gesture and we were praised for our outfits, but looking back I'm slightly horrified.

       The Christian tradition doesn't bother me today, but in my memory going to church Easter Sunday meant sitting and listening to how humans are a faulty creature.  Jesus had to die in order for us to be whole and even then we had to devote our lives to this being.  For me, and maybe my memories are tainted by my mindset now, its a holiday where you are reminded how unworthy you really are.

The other aspect of Easter, which seems ridiculous, is rabbits and eggs.  I believe its linked to the pagan celebration of the spring equinox, but what its morphed into seems a bit daft.  I just set up the Easter village in the bay window yesterday.  For some reason I'm the only one who can set it up "the right way".  I think my sister just wants an excuse not to do it. :)  The Easter version of the village is so cutesy that it makes me slightly nauseous.  There are little dressed up bunnies in various forms of action - carrying signs with little carrots on them, planting flowers, watering a garden, walking arm in arm, holding a flowered arch, etc.  I set it up with the Easter pieces because I know it means a lot to the rest of my family.  If I were to do it my way there wouldn't be any pastel buildings or personified bunnies.

I have had some nice Easters.  This year I'm going to opt out.  I'm going to use my thesis as my excuse and stay away from the festivities that will ensue at my parents' house.

This year will be a celebration of the coming of spring by, weather permitting, reading by the lake.  Money will soon be tight, but I'm going to buy myself a book as a treat for handling the winter in a mentally healthy way.

Happy Spring!